Tell Me How to Save a Life
by PrincessAlica
Summary: A re-imagining of moments in Grey's Anatomy to save Derek Shepherd's Life. Many from the episodes surrounding Derek's death, but I will add any that occur to me as ways to save a life.
1. How Blue Tooth Saved Derek Shepherd's Li

**I'm still gutted by Derek's death, and now with news of another departure I had to channel it into something. Derek didn't need to die, so the point of this story is providing small treasonable tweaks to the story line for him to live. So here is my list of ways to Save Derek's Life – in no Particular order. This is my first foray into Grey's fanfiction. More might be more added later. and I apologize. I have no idea what happened to my formatting. When I uploaded it last night on my end it looked fine.**

Derek breathed an exhausted sigh as he watched the final crushed vehicle towed away. He climbed in his car, taking the time to buckle his seat belt, after all, he had just watched the devastation on the human body that being ejected from a car could cause. He pulled onto the road to head back home. There was no way that he was going to be able to make it to Washington today. He heard the buzzing of his phone, which was a little surprising since he had had such a hard time getting cell phone reception on this "short cut". He waited a moment and pushed the button on his steering wheel and answered the call as a red semi barreled past him, going far too fast for the curving road with many blind spots.

"Derek Shepherd." He answered.

"This is the President's office. The President was concerned that he had not heard from you, confirming your time of arrival. Are you on route?"

"No, listen, I'm sorry, but there was an accident on the way to the airport. The last of the scene just was cleared, and I will catch a flight in the morning. Please give the President my sincere apologies."

"Of course, Dr. Shepherd."

"I'll call back later after I have my flight scheduled. I need to go check on my wife."

********** How Bluetooth saved Derek Shepherd's life.


	2. How looking at his phone before pulling

Derek settled in his car, relieved that all of the victims from the car accident were relatively stable. He couldn't imagine how they would have all survived if he hadn't been in the right place at the wrong time. He fumbled around the car for a moment looking for his phone. Just as he finally found it, where it had fallen during his evasive maneuvers to avoid the crash ahead of him, the phone began ringing. He looked up just in time to see a Red semi swerve slightly around him as he answered the phone.

"Meredith" he smiled into the phone. "You just couldn't wait to talk to me."

He heard the panic in her voice, "No, no, I'm fine. There was an accident. I wasn't injured. I'm heading home. I'm going to have to call the President's office and fly tomorrow, but Mer, I really think we should both go and take the kids." He grinned as he listened to her, his face sobering as he heard the chaos of the hospital in the background. "I'm on the way. I'll see you soon. I love you."

**********"how looking for his phone before pulling onto the road saved Derek Shepherd's life*************


	3. Finding his phone while waiting on wreck

**I'll fix this one at home! Sorry for the craziness!**

While Derek waited for the wreckers to arrive on the scene, he climbed in his car searching for his phone. There was still no reception, but he pocketed the device and drummed on his steering wheel as he waited for everything to be completed. He quickly composed a text message to send to the president's office, explaining as briefly as possible, with a promise to call as soon as he had better service to explain why he hadn't made it to his meeting.

As soon as the second wrecker left the scene, he started his car and pulled onto the road, heading back towards Grey-Sloan. After the accident he witnessed today, he appreciated how quickly things could go wrong, and he needed to see Meredith and Zola and Bailey just to reassure himself. He passed a Red Semi barreling down the road, but he was focused on getting back to his family. He held himself back from speeding too much, but it didn't take too long before her pulled into his usual spot in the parking lot and hopped out of the car. After a brief call to Washington, with a detailed explanation of his drive to the airport and promises to fly out in the morning, he headed inside.

The Emergency Room was chaos. There had been a small plane crash, and he knew that he needed to find Meredith. There were too many bad memories that would be stirred in any of the crash survivors – After all he had lost his lifetime best friend and Meredith had lost her kid sister.

He rode the elevator up to the level of the daycare, because not only did he want to see him wife, but he also needed to see both of his children. He had missed out on a lot while he had been in Washington, D.C. Both were excited to see him. He picked Bailey up, and then Bailey wrapped his chubby little arms around his fathers neck and buried his face in the fabric, breathing in deeply. Derek crouched down and Zola wrapped herself around him.

Without wasting time searching for Meredith, he called her. With both children securely in his arms, he didn't want to go any longer without hearing her voice. He realized that she probably needed the reassurance that he was fine. After all, he knew that she sometimes dealt with nightmares from the plane crash, the shooting, and his subsequent erratic behavior. Her words still chilled him when he thought of her fears of losing him in a car crash. After all, that almost had happened today. Even if she was in surgery, one of the interns could put it on speaker or hold it to her ear. He needed the reassurance that she was fine – and not in the Meredith definition of the word, but the actual Webster's definition.

She answered immediately, a panicked quiver ringing in her voice. "Derek? Where are you?"

"I'm here at Grey-Sloan. I missed my flight. There was a car accident." He explained briefly.

The president's office called. You didn't make your meeting."

"I'll explain more in a little bit, but I came down to the daycare to see the kids." He sighed, shifting Bailey on his hip as he stood, stretching out his frame.

"I'll be out of surgery in about 30 minutes. You know I'm sure we could use your hands up here." He could hear an edge to her voice.

"You know, I'll leave the kids here at daycare for just a little longer and then we can do something as a family. See you in a bit, Mere." He kissed both children and gave them one extra squeeze before heading up to the surgery floor.

"When the elevator opened, he was face to face with the chaos of surgery, as some of the car crash victims and plan crash victims were in the operating theatres. He stared at the board for a moment, noting which room Meredith was operating in. He quickly ducked into the scrub room, where he recognized his wife poised over a patient, all of her focus on the person on the table. He knew that if her mask hadn't been hiding her mouth, that he would be able to see them pursing in concentration. He grabbed a mask and entered the room, "Does anyone need a Neurosurgeon?" he said, his eyes twinkling with happiness and pride at how much Meredith had grown over the years.

Meredith turned towards him after a moment, her eyes crinkling around the edges, clearly showing her delight in seeing him. "I'm just about to close up, Dr. Shepherd."

"I'll just wait for you outside then, unless someone happened to actually need a "Brainless Brain Surgeon." He slipped front the room and waited for her, leaning against the wall outside of the scrub room.

He didn't have long to wait for Meredith to come out of the OR, freshly scrubbed out. She rushed to him, flinging his arms around his neck. He dipped his head to meet her lips, pulling her body closely to his. "Meredith" he breathed.

She broke the kiss and curled into him, digging into his arms, suddenly trembling. "Derek. There was a plane crash. I thought. I Thought. I thought I had lost you!" She stuttered out.

He petted her hair, oblivious to the people swirling around them. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." She relaxed against him, her breathing slowly as his presence expelled the fear.

"You fool, with your perfect hair." A voice said from beside him. The small dark haired woman coming toward him was a force to be reckoned with, despite her small stature. "You had Meredith terrified. You need to get your head out of …"

"You're absolutely right Bailey," he soothed with a chuckle, as his hands still running up and down Meredith's back. "I'm a little shaken up as well. There was a major car accident right in front of me, and if I hadn't stopped as quickly as I did, I very well would have been a part of it. But thankfully, I was able to help, and I believe that some of your patients in the OR are from that accident."

Meredith pulled away from him and lunged towards the nearest trash car, expelling everything inside of her. He followed her and held her hair back from her face. "You're ok. It's ok."

He turned back towards Bailey, 'Miranda, I think I need to take her home. I want to spend a little time with the rest of my family."

******How Derek found his phone while waiting on the wrecker and saved his own life"


	4. How Life 360 Saved Derek Shepherd

**"This is a scenario that I've thought of many times. In this day and age, how did they not track Derek down. It is a pretty simple solution.**

Miranda Bailey could tell that Meredith was not going to calm down after she received the call from the President's office. "You're a doctor, Meredith Grey. Don't you have some kind of fancy phone thing that tells you where your husband is?"

Meredith blinked at her, her thoughts clearing for a moment, as she fumbled for her phone. She quickly activated the life 360 ap. She frowned in confusion. "Derek is at Dillard Medical Center on the other side of Seattle."

Miranda took the phone from her colleague's hand for a moment. "then why don't you call Dillard."

Meredith took back her phone and googled the number and called. She held her breath as she waited. Finally someone answered, and Meredith rambled out "Have you seen my husband? Derek Shepherd? Dr. Derek Shepherd? He was supposed to be in Washington, D.C. talking to the President about the brain mapping initiative and he never showed up. He's attractive, dark hair, blue eyes…"

"The lady on the phone cut her off. "We do have a person in the E.R matching that description."

"Meredith's eyes widened, "Is he hurt?"

"I'm sorry ma'am, I can't give out that information until we have an I.D. can you give more information?"

Of course," she whispered. Fighting with someone across the phone wouldn't help if indeed Derek was in this God Forsaken, Podunk Emergency Room. What mattered was getting to Derek, and besides, it was much more effective to argue in person. "Bailey, I'm leaving. I think Derek is in the ER at some little hospital that I've never heard of."

As she was rushing from the building, she ran into Amelia. "Where's the fire?" Amelia snipped at her, but then did a double take and grabbed Meredith's arm. "Oh. My. God. Is something wrong with Derek?"

Meredith stuttered and tried to pull away, which only further cemented Amelia's suspicions. "Oh, no. You're not going anywhere without an explanation."

Meredith huffed, but was in too much of a hurry to argue with her sister in law. "Fine. I think he's a John Doe at some little hospital on the edge of the Wilderness. We don't have time to argue."

Amelia instead of protesting grabbed her arm again and was pulling Meredith towards the exit. "Give me your keys. Better safe than sorry. Maybe Maggie can pick up the kids after we know what is going on with Derek, if it is even Derek." She jogged ahead of Meredith and slid into the drivers seat. Meredith was too worried to even bother arguing with her. They plugged the address into the GPS, and Amelia drove like the hounds of hell were chasing her.

When they arrived at the medical center, Amelia dropped Meredith off at the emergency entrance, while she parked the car. When she found her way in, she quickly located Meredith arguing with the admitting nurse. Meredith flashed a few pictures on her phone, and the nurse led them to the ER doctor on call. Within moments, they were led to a cubicle where a torn body lay on the gurney. Meredith's hand slipped over her mouth. "D. De Der-ek. Oh God!" She took a step back, wavering on her feet. Amelia placed her hand on her sister in laws back, until Meredith grasped the railing in front of her. His eyes opened, the blue startling in the bruised face. Pain was etched in them, but he clearly recognized his family.

The momentary shock disappeared and the instinct born from years working in a level one trauma center kicked in. Amelia instantly began assessing Derek's neurological function, while Meredith began to asses the injuries on his abdomen. For a moment the sisters were working in unison. "He needs a CT. Now!" Amelia shuddered.

A serious looking red-headed doctor stepped into the cubicle. "I'm sorry, but what are you doing here?"

"This is my husband," Meredith spat out at the same time as Amelia responded with He's my brother."

"I'm Dr. Penny Blake. All right, but I need you to both leave the area while we stabilize him. He's got some serious injuries. We need to get him to surgery."

"No." Amelia insisted. "I'm not leaving him to be murder in some back woods clinic. He needs a CT. He's got a head lac." Derek's eyes focused momentarily on his baby sister. "He'd tell you the same thing if he would speak."

The three women were interrupted by an older doctor who began ordering them all around until he realized that two of the women did not belong. "You both need to leave while we take him up to surgery."

"No. You're taking him for a CT before you do anything." Meredith growled.

"And who do you think you are? Ordering me around in my own hospital." He bit back.

"I'm Meredith Grey. You might have heard of my mother, Dr. Ellis Grey or my husband Dr. Derek Shepherd. You're not going to kill my husband by skipped a step that could mean the difference between him getting to watch our children grow up and me losing him tonight!"

The man looked ready to argue, but then Amelia butted in. "I'm the head of Neurosurgery at Grey-Sloan Memorial. Get him a damned head CT before I sure your ass off and close the doors of "your" hospital. Show me where CT is, and I'll do it myself."

Again he began to bristle, "If you're family, you should know it isn't ethical to treat him. I must insist that you allow me to do my job."

"Then don't f***ing make me need to. A little ironic for a brain bleed to be what would make a brilliant brain surgeon, brain dead. I'm the best option he has right now, and you're wasting time arguing with me."

Meredith was already preparing to move Derek's bed, while Amelia was fighting with the doctor. She looked down unto his eyes which stared up at her unblinking, "You're going to be all right, Derek. We've got you." She dropped a soft kiss on an unblemished spot on his face and squeezed his unbroken hand. He blinked at her, as though trying to relay a message. Meredith turned to the senior doctor. "Dr. I understand that you've been practicing for years longer than we have, but I will sign whatever the hell paper you want, just take him to get a CT right now. A CT doesn't have to take long, and it could mean all ther difference in the world to this man. My husband, the father of my children. A man who is literally changing the world. Derek Shepherd is not going to die today from incompetence because the EMTs brought him hear instead of Grey Sloan."

Meredith and Amelia began pushing him out of the cubicle, "Listen, I will run you over if I have to. Show me where your CT is, now!" And finally the doctor relented, leading the women to the CT room, with Dr. Blake tagging along behind. As soon as the scans began coming up on the screen, Amelia began demanding that they take Derek to an OR immediately. The senior doctor again protested due to their relationship to the patient, and Meredith had to pull Amelia back before she punched the other doctor. "If there is another Neurosurgeon that can be in the OR scrubbed before I can, then fine, I will back down, but until I see someone else ready to drain that brain bleed, I am going to operate. I watched my dad die in front of me, and it will not happen to my brother. Another generation of Shepherd kids aren't going to grow up without a father. Get the hell out of my way. You can call Grey-Sloan and check my credentials. Just do it now, so that I can save his life." As soon as Derek was loaded on the bed, he was whisked away to the OR. Amelia stopped Meredith from following, "I know you want to be in there, but I've got this. Call my mom. Call Bailey. Call Maggie. Get your kids here, and let my mom know she needs to come. I know it is what Derek wants. And I can't save his life if you are watching me."

Meredith nodded numbly. She knew that more than anything, Derek needed Amelia's skills. She founded her way back to the ER, her purse lying on the floor in the cubicle where Derek had been. She shuddered to think of how differently things could have been if she had just ignored that feeling. She had watched him almost die more times than she cared to remember.

She fished her phone out of her purse, noticing immediately the number of missed calls and text messages. First thing was to take care of Zola and Bailey, so she texted Maggie asking her to bring the kids to her, and letting her know if she couldn't then to ask Alex. With the adrenaline wearing off, she felt her legs growing rubbery as she melted to the floor, noticing the specks of blood on the floor, Derek's blood... She bowed her head and tried to focus on breathing, thinking of the moment during her intern year as Derek had helped her breathe when she was having a panic attack in a supply closet. This was all too much. Today was too much. Too many memories, memories of the very worst moments of her life. And today she was alone.

She pulled her phone and stared at it for a moment before flicking through her contacts list and calling Carolyn Shepherd. Carolyn answered after several rings, "Meredith, dear?"

"Carolyn? Mom?" And in that moment, Meredith who had been holding it all together, completely lost control. Her body began shaking and her voice quivered as she sobbed. "There's been an accident. Derek was in an accident. You need to come. Amy said you need to come."

"Did he make it?" Her mother-in-laws voice whispered through the phone line.

"Amelia is in surgery with him." Meredith squeezed her eyes shut, trying to gather herself. He has a head lac and is bleeding into his abdomen, and we are at some little out of the way hospital that I've never heard of. It would be so much if we were at Grey-Sloan... I just need you to come."

Carolyn Shepherd assured Meredith that she would be on her way as soon as she could book a flight. Asking Meredith to keep her updated when she could. Meredith agreed.

Not long after, a nurse came into the cubicle and helped Meredith gather her belongings that had been dropped so unceremoniously at the site of Derek, and led her to a small waiting area.

;"************How Life360 or find my iphone saved Derek's life./span/span/span/p


	5. How Slamming on the Gas Saved Derek Shep

"Derek reached for the phone that had slid out of his grasp when he had slammed on the brakes. Once the phone was in his hand, he looked up and saw a semi bearing down on him. Derek slammed on the gas, aware that the farther back the impact was, the more likely he was to survive, and he wanted to survive. He had his entire life ahead of him.

His life flashed before him. He thought of meeting Meredith, of the feeling of her in his arms, of the feeling that he could breathe again for the first time in years, of holding Zola and knowing she was meant to be his daughter, of holding Bailey, unsure if Meredith was going to make it. He thought of his mother, his sisters, and then he thought of Mark, all of the stupid things he had done in a lifetime as his friend.

And in an instant, it was over. The car had slipped just far enough with that burst of acceleration to avoid the impact. Derek drove just far enough to find a clear spot to pull over on the side of the road, realizing just how close he had come to losing his life./

***** How slamming on the gas saved Derek Shepherd's Life *********


	6. How a Stalled Ambulance Saved Derek Shep

"Derek wanted to punch the sorry rig that was leaving the scene of the crash as it stalled and almost didn't make it. But after some sputtering, it began its journey to the hospital where the victims could be treated.

He walked back to his car and climbed in, pulling the seat belt over him and snapping it into place before starting the engine. As he began to ease off of the brakes, a red semi thundered past him. Derek cursed under his breath at the negligent driver, but took another breath and headed back towards home.

****** How a stalled Ambulance Saved Derek Shepherd's Life*****

**If you look on the extras from season 11, you will find footage of the ambulance leaving the scene and stalling. Why not use it to our advantage here?**


	7. How an EMT's Argument saved Derek

"The two EMT's argued for a moment about where to take this latest victim.

"He's in pretty bad shape. Dillard is the closest." The first stressed.

"Yes, but I'm pretty sure if we take him there he will die. He's better off if we can get him to Grey-Sloan. This is more than Dillard can handle, or Seattle Presbyterian for that matter. If this man has any shot, Seattle Grace-MercyWEst- whatever the hell its called now is where we need to take him."

"Fine, but if he dies on route, this is on you."

"I can live with that. Now give me a hand. We need to get this IV started now."

**"****** How an EMT's argument saved Derek Shepherd's Life*********


	8. How a Flat Tire Saved Derek Shepherd

Derek looked down in disgust. The wrecker was gone, and he had somehow missed the fact that he had run over something in the wreck. It wasn't much, but enough that his front tire was rapidly losing air. "Dammit!" he exclaimed in frustration, taking out his annoyance on the sagging tire as a red semi lumbered past him. He tried to flag the semi down, after all, he hadn't had any luck with cell phone reception.

Just then his phone began ringing, he hurried around to the passenger side and fumbled for the device, picking up just in time to hear his wife's concerned voice. "Derek?" are you all right? The president's office called. They said you never showed up."

He raked his free hand through his hair. "There was an accident on the way to the airport, and I helped rescue some people. unfortunately my tire found some glass or debris and I'm stranded out here. I'm surprised your call call through"

"Derek?" Meredith's voice began to crackle. "Where are you?" And then the phone beeped as the call dropped.

"Great!" muttered to himself in frustration. "Guess, now is a good time for a walk."

It was over a mile before he found a gas station where he could wait for a taxi or a tow truck. On the way he composed several text messages, sending them, hoping for a clearing in the reception so that even if he couldn't call out that his messages would be delivered. He texted Meredith to let her know where he was waiting. And by the time his tire was patched, it was nearly five o'clock. He hurried home to find Meredith waiting on him.

He pulled her into his arms, smiling as he whispered, "you waited for me?"

She pulled away from him for a moment to peer up into his eyes, which were twinkling down at her. "Where else would I be?"

He leaned down and kissed her softly. "I love you."

****How a flat tire saved Derek Shepherd's Life****


	9. Another Round in the On-call Room

Derek grinned at Meredith, "You want to go again?" They both sighed at the sound of a small voice crying from down the hall. I guess not." Bailey's up."

Trying to stretch out this moment, he suggests "What if I change my flight? I could come by the hospital before I get to the airport, and we could find an empty on-call room and Huh? I have work to do at work.

I can't do you, too.

Okay, well, then it's settled.

" Let's go again now. "

Come on.

Come here.

\- No! Absolutely not! You are terrible! Terrible influence! We are getting up now.

So, we're gonna go again, huh? Oh.

Hey.

Best wife ever.

\- Hmm.

\- Mwah.

I just wish, I don't know, you could stay or I could come with you or something.

I'll be back soon.

You know that.

I know.

I know.

I just feel like I just got you back, and now you're going again, and I-I just have to stay here.

You're right.

You do.

You have to stay here.

Don't move.

Wait for me.

I'll be back before you know it.

Meredith was having a rotten day. She was already missing Derek, and she just had that gut feeling, that really strong gut feeling that something horrible was about to happen. To the point she was ready to call Derek and tell him to reschedule his flight. Perhaps the flight was doomed. Maybe that was the reason she was so on edge. Or maybe she needed to fly to Washington with him. She needed to do something. She pulled out her phone and began searching for flight options to D.C. Maybe she could surprise. She was strolling down the hall, when someone tugged her from behind into an on-call room. She gasped when she looked up, face to face with her husband. "Derek." She breathed.

"I rescheduled my flight. I wanted a few more chances at expanding our family." He chuckled as he reached behind her and locked the on-call room door. He leaned down and pulled one of her ear lobes between his teeth, gently sucking on it as he rubbed slowly wandering circles, lower and lower.

She wanted to swat him away, but he was stirring her to life. "Derek," she whispered. She meant to scold him, to tell him to stop, but she was breathless and liquid in his arms. "Derek," again she tried to protest, but it was lost as he moved to her lips, swallowing the protest.

"I'm on a later flight. I missed you. One night was not enough. I can't live without you," he soothed after releasing her, his hands still rubbing those damn, slow circles. "The president will just have to wait for me," he crooned.

"Fine," she responded, still breathy from their kisses, her pulse rapid and her heart pounding. He quickly picked her up and carried her to the bed, tossed over his shoulder. Her laughter escaping like champagne bubbles. "I can't resist you"

"So why bother even trying?" He coaxed, twisting so that she collapsed on top of him, as he began kissing her.

"I'm not. I concede!"

*** How rescheduling his flight for another round in the on-call room saved Derek Shepherd's life


	10. Meredith's FreakOut saved Derek Shepherd

Derek: Hi. You've reached Dr. Shepherd. Please leave a message, and I will return your call.

Meredith: Hey. So, I just got off the phone with the White House, and apparently you missed your meeting. I don't know what's going on, but you probably owe them - a phone call, I think. [Door slams.]

Meredith followed the stream of interns racing into the pit, unable to shake the knot in the pit of her stomach. She'd gone from "blessed" to this knot in an incredibly short span of time.

[Sighs.]

You good? You okay? I'm fine.

'Cause, you know, there was a plane crash, and I just thought maybe For about a year after the crash, Arizona had nightmares, and if I'd come home even 10 minutes late, she'd freak out, so I just wanted to see if you're doing okay.

Derek missed his meeting in D.C.

, and I haven't heard from him.

\- That's not weird.

\- Okay.

It's not like I should have heard from him.

I we don't call each other every second.

We're not those people.

I'm a surgeon.

I'm busy.

He's in D. C.

He's busy.

So it's fine that I haven't heard from him.

It's not a thing.

It's the plane crash, Meredith.

The plane crash is making you worry.

I know.

I know.

[Sighs.]

[Sighs.]

You'll call me if she... Just call me.

M: For a while, I would FaceTime Cristina.

I would prop her up right there where your head is now.

Half the time, she was in surgery, so I would just watch her operate until I drifted off.

I brought the kids in the bed for a while so we could all sleep together.

I printed a tumor, and I slept with that there for a bit.

[Laughs.]

It's just weird. I That pillow's been empty for such a long time.

Not now. Not anymore. I know.

I just wished you didn't have to go back to D.C. at all.

I wish you could just stay right here, right now.

It's my last trip, and then I'm back for good.

I promise.

I know.

I've missed you.

I missed us.

I have, too.

Bailey: [Echoing.] Okay, let's pack all four quadrants. Can you feel the mesentery? Grey. Did you find the mesentery?

M: Oh, I was just Sorry.

B: Dr. Grey, do you need to be replaced?

Meredith: No. I'm fine.

Bailey: No, you're not fine. You're distracted. You and Derek went down in a plane. You drowned. He got shot. You gave birth in a power outage.

Meredith: Is this supposed to make me feel better?

Bailey: I'm just saying, you have every reason to be distracted, every reason to think the sky is falling.

Do you need to go?

M: No!

B:Okay, well, how long can you go without hearing from him before you absolutely go crazy?

M:I don't know. I I 6:00, 6:30, maybe.

B:Okay, then, let's say 5:00. At 5:00 P.M. , if you haven't heard from him, you can panic. You can call the police, call the paramedics.

You can freak out until your little heart's content. But not one minute before and not in this O. R. Can you do that?

"Yes." Meredith agreed, but then that nagging feeling returned, her gut clenching, her eyes growing wide. "No"

Dr. Bailey looked up at Meredith, mildly surprised. Meredith stammered out, "Bailey, I can't. I'm sorry, I can't until I know what happened. I'll call the airline and see if he ever checked in and then I can go from there, but he saved me from drowning because he was right there, and Christina was able to save him after the shooting because we were right there when it happened, and if something happened to him and I stayed here, I will always wonder if I had gone, if things would be different." Meredith backed away from the table. "I'm sorry, Bailey."

"No, it's fine, and not in your twisted sense of the word. Go find him, and you will feel better." Meredith quickly pulled off her gown and gloves and hurried to scrub out. "Good luck, Meredith."

Her first call was to SeaTac to check and see if Derek had ever checked in for his flight. The knot in her stomach grew as she waited, only growing larger as she learned that he had never checked in. He hadn't just missed his flight and taken a later one. Derek had never arrived.

Having grown accustomed to expecting the absolute worst to happen, Meredith began calling the police to check on an accident. His car was distinctive enough, and she soon was rewarded with the knowledge that his car had been in an accident on an out of the way road that for the life of her she couldn't figure out why he would be on. She quickly scribbled down info as they informed her that there had been several accidents on that road today. Some had been taken to Grey-Sloan and the others to Dillard. Derek was far too well known at Grey-Sloan for someone to have missed knowing who he was. She would have already heard if Derek had been brought in to the pit at Grey-Sloan. She ran to the attending's lounge to grab her car keys. She could call Maggie or Alex or Amelia or someone on the way. Someone could take care of Zola and Bailey, but all she knew what that Derek wasn't answering his phone, and he had been in a car accident. The universe freaking hated her!

Her heart was racing, and the elevator wasn't coming quickly enough. She ran for the stairs. She'd call Dillard on the way. They could confirm that he was there, but she didn't trust the universe not to screw her over royally. It was up to her to save Derek. She somehow knew it.

She drove as quickly as she could, confirming that a male matching Derek's description had been brought in and was in critical condition. She was seething as she drove: at the universe and at Derek and at the EMTs who had taken Derek to some other hospital when they should have taken him to Grey-Sloan and at herself for doubting her instincts. And she needed that anger, needed that anger to fight, because otherwise she would cave. It was freaking ridiculous of her to think that she was blessed. She was dark and twisty, and she attracted the worst things to happen to her. Of course the universe would not allow her to be happy for more than five freaking minutes…Of course the instant she was happy the entire world would begin to implode on her, after all isn't that what happened when Derek got shot and when the plane crashed…. And she had to stop thinking about it all or she would go crazy, completely crazy.

She pulled in to the unfamiliar E.R., slamming her door and sprinting into the building. "Derek Shepherd. Where is he?"

The woman sitting at the admission desk looked at her list, "I'm sorry. We don't have anyone by that name."

Meredith huffed, running her fingers through. "Rescue said that the people from the accident were taken here and the others to Grey-Sloan. He's a doctor there. They would have recognized him. Are you sure that you just don't have your files updated, maybe he's already left." Of course if he had left, he would have called her, he would have left her a message. She turned away in frustration. Across the room the curtain of one of the cubicles parted enough for her to see there was a major trauma case, as doctors and nurses buzzed around the patient. Before anyone could stop her, she bolted across the room, peeking into the curtain, because that would explain everything. It had to be Derek.

The admitting nurse followed after her and grabbed her arm trying to pull her away from the cubicle, but Meredith fought, "no, that is Derek. That is my husband." She pulled away, and pushed herself to his bedside. She had the authority as a doctor in her bearing, that the doctors swarming for the moment didn't even seem to register that she did not belong. "Has he had a CT?" His eyes opened to stare at her. "Oh, Derek." she whispered. She grabbed a pen light and began the process of checking his neurological function. "Can you squeeze my hand?" His hand remained limp in hers as she rubbed circles with her thumb on the back of his uninjured hand.

"Get him a CT, now!" she barked at the nurse and the red headed doctor that was entering the space. They didn't move, and Meredith continued her examination. "Did you hear me? He needs a CT and to get into surgery."

"Ma'am, I'm sorry. But I'm going to have to ask you to leave," the red-head ordered. "the doctors need to be able to work on him."

"What do you think I am? Do you think that I'm wearing these scrubs for the fun of it?" she motioned towards the navy scrubs that she hadn't had the time to change out of in her rush to find him. "I'm Dr. Meredith Grey. I am a doctor, and so is he. He's a neurosurgeon. One of the best in the country, in fact, try calling the president and asking him if you need to, but I know what I'm talking about. He needs a CT, and he needs it now, not in 5 minutes, not in an hour. Do you see that head lac? He could have a brain bleed. My husband could die if it is not caught, and with all we've survived, from secret marriages, to ferry boat crashes, to a mass shooting, to a plane crash, he's not going to freaking die because of some stupid car crash. My husband is not going to die today. I won't let him." She looked at Derek, "110, remember?"

"OK, let me just get the attending in here."

Meredith cut her off, "I will find your CT, and cut in front of anyone right now. I save him single-handedly if I have to. I almost went into Neuro, I studied under Derek for several years, and if I have to drill the burr holes to save him, I will do the freaking burr holes myself. Just get out of my way."

"We don't even have a positive ID on this patient." the nurse stammered.

"Dr. Derek Christopher Shepherd. Have you not been listening, now back out of my way. Call who ever you want, but I'm getting him the help he needs, so you can help me help him or you can get out of my way."

***************How Meredith couldn't wait to freak out until she found out where Derek was and saved his life.********


	11. How trying to save his marriage saved

**So there are more moments that could have saved Derek's life, including if he had gone back to New York with Addison. So here's another take on how to save a life.**

Derek was gone. Meredith sighed in frustration. After the events of the previous evening, she believed that things were going to end up going her way, that he would choose her and love her and most of all pick her. But he hadn't. Apparently last night had been one last fling before Derek decided to really fight for his marriage and his wife. And now he was leaving Seattle. He was returning to New York with Addison in tow. And Meredith realized that there was a high likelihood that she would never see his McDreamy smile again. It made the choice easy. Finn Dandridge was a good guy, and he deserved to be more than just someone's second choice. But now there was no choice. Finn was it.

But then Derek returned briefly, and a ferry boat crashed in the harbor and Derek saved her life. And yet somehow he blamed himself for her near drowning, as though his presence brought only pain and suffering. So once she was recovered, he left again.

Five years later

Meredith was at a conference in Washington, D.C. when she stumbled across Derek again. It had been five long years, and they both showed the difference in the time across their faces. There was a little silver showing at Derek's temple and his hair was trimmed shorter than the style he had sported during his time in Seattle. Laugh lines crinkled around Meredith's eyes, and there was a sense that she had gotten more serious. Seeing him again was like a breath of fresh air, like she could finally breathe again, like she had been holding her breath under water and didn't even realize it. As soon as he saw her, he pulled her into his arms, tightly embracing her where they stood for a moment reveling in each other's presence..

Years seemed to fall away as Derek began talking about the new Brain mapping initiative that he was working on for the President and asking Meredith how she'd been. He pulled her across the street of the conference to a small bistro and bought them both coffee and pastries. They seemed to know him there.

"Are you here in D.C. now?" she asked as she picked at the croissant in front of her.

"Yes, I moved here about a year ago, after the divorce was finalized. I'm thrilled to be on this project, but sometimes I miss the rush of surgery." He said with a sheepish grin. "You look good Meredith. How is Finn?"

Meredith sipped at her Mocha. He hadn't even had to ask what to get her to drink, and it was perfect. "Finn and I didn't last. He was a great guy, but it just wasn't meant to be I guess. So I guess you and Addison didn't end up working out either."

"Unfortunately once a cheater always a cheater. She moved to L.A. Ironically she found someone other that Mark. I really thought he was going to stay in Seattle, but Manhattan is the best place for him. Enough hospitals and nurse and… well, he's still being a man-whore." Derek chuckled at his last statement. "I don't think Mark will ever change, but I did see that he's been flying to Seattle occasionally. We keep in touch, especially now Addison is out of the picture."

Meredith grinned up at his, once again mesmerized by his eyes. "Actually, I think he's dating my half-sister. They're very on-again off again, but I think they're getting serious."

"I didn't realize that you had a half-sister who would be dating Mark."

"Her name is Lexie, and actually she just is finishing up her 5th year of residency specializing in Neuro. She wanted to come to the conference, but someone had to stay back in Seattle to watch my patients. I mean, Shadow Shepherd is all right, but he isn't you." Meredith rambled.

"I was so happy to see that you'd passed your boards and specialized in Neuro. I always knew that you had what it takes. I wished that I had stayed there to finish teaching you, but I had to really give all of my effort into trying to repair Addison and I's marriage. I don't regret it, even though it didn't last. It was like continuing CPR even long past when you know the patient is gone…" Derek looked down and stirred the last bit of liquid in his cup which was filled with black coffee. He picked it up and swallowed the last few mouthfuls.

"Derek, now you're the one rambling." Meredith teased as she reached out and brushed against his hand. They both startled at the electricity that jolted through them.

He chuckled, "and that was always your job." Meredith crinkled her nose in amusement, as his thumb began to sweep smoothly across her hand. "Mere, did I hear something about a shooting at Seattle Grace?"

Meredith nodded, "It was awful. Alex Karev was killed. Richard was shot and almost didn't make it. We were reeling for months. I've seriously considered leaving there several times, just because it seems like there is always something awful about to happen. We actually out of my intern class Christina and I are the only ones who made it through. George was hit by a bus. Izzie had a brain tumor that was deemed inoperable, and then the shooting happened. And now Christina has moved to Switzerland, taking over for Burke."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Can I ask why you've stayed?" Derek asked softly.

"I never had a reason to go anywhere else." She shrugged. "I'm alone, since I really have little time for a life outside of the hospital, and I know that isn't really an excuse, but I spend time with my sister, Lexie." Meredith's phone vibrated on the table. She didn't answer the call, but it did alert both of them to the passing of time.

"I've got to head back to the conference, since I'm the key note speaker, but afterwards, why don't we got out to dinner. With the way everything happened in Seattle, I never did really take you on many proper dates."

"That sounds really good Derek. I think I'd like to get to know you again. As long as you promise no secret wives." She winked.

"No secret wives. Addison and I are officially divorced, and I'm not seeing anyone." He assured as he offered his hand to her. She took it, every bit of contact that they had increasingly making her remember what had connected them in the first place. She looked up at him as she rose, wondering if he was feeling the same things that she was. Once they stepped outside of the little bistro her question was answered, as he swooped down to caress her lips with his own. The kiss was intense and the years had not lessened the impact, if anything she felt her desire for him more keenly. He was equally impacted and a kiss that had meant to be a soft one turned hungry and desperate as he pushed her against the brick façade of the building that they had just exited. When he finally pulled away, a breathy "wow" escaped.

She nodded mutely at him, her heart beat pounding in her chest.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have…" he apologized, but was cut off by Meredith's lips seeking out his own.

"Well what do we have here?" a deep voice rumbled out in a chuckle.

They parted slowly, almost sheepishly, as Derek turned to his grinning friend, "Mark, what are you doing here?" there was a tinge of frustration in his voice.

"I was coming to grab a bite before I went to hear your talk on the Brain Mapping Initiative. Didn't know I stumbled across you sucking face with Meredith Grey. I didn't even know you still were in contact with each other, but clearly you're ready for some - contact." He crowed wolfishly.

"You know, I don't think I missed you at all, Mark." Meredith tossed at him with a glare.

"So you're grown up Neuro-surgeon now, and not just a baby intern. How does that happen? I've missed the other member of the dirty mistresses club." He added with a leer.

"As fun as this reunion is," Derek interrupted, "We need to head back to the conference before I miss my speech." He grabbed Meredith's hand and pulled her towards him. "Is your number the same? Or we can just meet at the registration desk."

"My number is the same. I'll meet you afterwards as long as you don't bring Tweedledum along." She motioned towards Mark.

Derek's eyes sparkled at her, "trust me, I will not be bringing him along."

"Wait a minute," Mark countered, "I'm a surgeon. I'm not dumb." He was studying Meredith's face, and then suddenly blurted out "Grey, do you have a sister?"

"Yes, Mark, you're dating my little sister. How did you just catch on to that? Haven't you noticed that we ramble the same? We both live in Seattle. I thought you knew who Lexie was."

"Huh. Well look at that Derek. We're dating sisters. I always tried to get you to go for those twins that were in our chemistry class our freshman year. They're clearly not twins, but…"

"Let me just stop you there, Mark" Meredith growled. "I'm not going to be any way of a three-some or four-some with you. And we're not dating. We just ate a meal together for the first time in half a decade. Slow down, McSteamy."

"I'm offended 'big grey'," he chuckled at the name. "That's what I'm going to call you from now on. Lexie can be 'little grey'." He smirked at them. "And I wouldn't dare presume, not after the whole Addison debacle. Derek here is pretty territorial." He leered at her, "not that I would be opposed if you were both open. I don't care what you call it, groping, mauling each other, God forbid call it something as innocent as dating, but what I interrupted could get you thrown in jail for public indecency in some countries. You may not be dating, but good luck finding a nicer name for it. Heck, if Derek had stayed in Seattle, you'd probably be married with several kids by now."

Meredith and Derek just nodded and headed back towards the conference with Mark trailing behind them like a misbehaving school boy. Once inside the conference area, they separated as Derek was pulled into a smaller lounge to wait for his turn to speak.

Mark trailed after Meredith, "Big Grey, slow down. I'll sit with you so that you don't have to be awkward alone. I can make even Derek's intellectual speech more interesting by twisting his words into dirty, dirty innuendo. Trust me, at least one of you will thank me later."

"Mark. I'm not an intern anymore. I don't need a babysitter."

"Have you ever considered that I would prefer to sit by someone that I know, like any normal human being?" Mark asked with a lifted eyebrow.

"Fine. You can sit with me, but can you at least be quiet. I actually want to listen to Derek's speech." Meredith returned.

Mark smirked, "Fine. I'll behave and do my best to limit putting too many dirty thoughts into your head, because despite the fact that it has been this long, I'm sure that there is some of that dark and twisty Meredith that already has all of the dirty thoughts swirling. After all, you were about to mount him on the sidewalk just a few minutes ago." He gestured toward the conference room door. "Lead the way, Dr. Grey."

Derek's speech was as exciting as she thought that it would be, even though she struggled to follow him because his voice did something to her that made her not want to follow along, and then every once in a while he would throw a smile in her direction. All too soon the talk was over. The breakout sessions sped past, and Meredith felt as though she were in a haze. She was counting the minutes until Derek was free so that she could spend a little time reacquainting herself with him. It had been too long, and even then, the choice to part had not been hers.

She was standing in the lobby of the hotel waiting for him to call her when she felt warm breath and soft lips suddenly caressing the skin of her neck. She didn't have to turn to know it was him. She could still feel him. That had apparently not changed in the intervening time. "I don't normally let strange men grope and maul me in public like this." She chuckled.

He blew on the warm skin he had been kissing, sending chills down her spine in the most pleasant way possible. "I guess I will have to be thankful that I'm not a strange man. And I have great hair."

She turned towards him, grinning. "I've always loved your hair, even though it has a little bit of silver mixed in now."

"Why don't we find a nice restaurant away from here. I don't want to be interrupted with the little time that I get to spend with you. Or I could cook you something at my house." He offered.

"You know how much I eat out. I think I'd like that. What are you planning on cooking?" Meredith quizzed as he grabbed her by the hand and headed towards the nearby parking garage.

"I could make you a steak and baked potato. We even stop at a store on the way and get you some Strawberry ice cream."

"Do we need to go to a specialty store to get your coffee ice cream?" she quizzed.

"No, I've come to enjoy strawberry. But I appreciate that you remember." he smiled as he led her to his car,opening the passenger door for her before getting in on his side. As they drove and picked up the ice cream and steaks, they discussed the different doctors that had been at Seattle- Grace during his brief tenure as chief of Neurosurgery. Meredith regaled him with the goings on of the hospital, informing him of the merger with Mercy West.

"You haven't been single for five years have you?" he quizzed.

"Well, no. For a brief time, I dated Jackson Avery, of the Harper Avery awards. And I've dated some, but no one was every right." she said glancing at him. "No one was ever you."

Derek looked over at her, while he waited at the red light. "Meredith, you can't..."

"Can't say what I'm thinking or feeling. I've grown up a lot since you left Seattle. I'm mostly whole and healed, or at least nearly a functional human." she defended.

He pulled smoothly into a drive way of relatively modest house, pushing the garage door button. He pulled in to the three car garage, with one of the spots sitting empty. "It isn't that I don't want you to tell me this, I just don't want you to have wasted time on me. I'm not worth it." He unbuckled, but Meredith was out of the car before he could make it to her side. So he reached behind behind her and grabbed the groceries.

"What do you mean you're not worth it? Derek you're a freaking gorgeous highly sought after Neurosurgeon. Don't you get how many of those women wanted to capture?" She followed him as he led her into the house. The house was immaculately clean, the dark wood floors gleaming with polish. The colors were warm and welcoming. "Wow, Derek your home is beautiful."

"I bought it when I moved here. It at least has a small backyard to grill out in, but aside from my family, I really haven't had many guests." He gestured around his living room before leading her into the kitchen. The home had clearly been modernized, but was tastefully blended with the historical style of the home. A set of French doors led out onto a covered patio. He stored the ice cream in the freezer before going out and lighting the grill. Meredith offered to help him, but he declined.

"Meredith, I know it has been a long time, but as I recall you're idea of gourmet is a grilled cheese." he chuckled.

"I'll have you know that I can toss a mean salad, and I can wash the potatoes and microwave them." He started to protest, but she inserted "I know to poke the potato so that it doesn't explode. Derek, its been five years and I have had to learn some things, even if I'm still not a chef. I have graduated to hamburger helper." she added with a chuckle.

"Why on earth am I cooking if you are capable of such culinary feats?"

Meredith fixed the salad and potatoes while Derek grilled the steaks. He poured them both a glass of red wine. They assembled the meal and sat together enjoy the time together. "Derek, this steak is perfect. You should open your own restaurant."

HE watched as she slid the final bite into her mouth. "Meredith, did I make a mistake coming back with Addie?"

She chewed thoughtfully for a moment, "As much as I wish you had chosen me after my dramatic speech, I think I needed some time to get past my childhood. I needed to find who I was, beyond the girl who went from one one-night-stand to another. I needed to find something more, and I guess I did. Maybe I would have figured it out if you had been there, but maybe I would have. I spent so long living under my mother's shadow. I think it took her being gone to get past the way she treated me. I guess she did the best that she could have, and I think I needed to find myself away from you."

"So have you found yourself?"

"I have Derek." Meredith rose from her seat and began clearing the table.

"You're a guest. You don't have to do that." he smiled, coming up behind her as she dipped her hands in the hot soapy water.

"I know Derek. But I don't want to leave you to clean up my messes." she sighed as his arms surrounded her. He ran his fingers down her arms until his descended into the water. He began caressing her hands with his before dropping his mouth to her neck, softly sucking before pulling an earlobe into his mouth, gently pulling on the skin with his teeth. "Derek..." she gasped as she set the last piece out of the water into the drainer. She turned to him meeting his mouth with her own, her still soapy hands reaching to thread through his hair. He lifted her so that she sat on the counter, the cold of the smooth granite seeping through her thin dress slacks. He stepped between her legs and continued his assault on her mouth.

After several minutes Derek pulled away, breathing heavily. "do you want this?" he asked.

Meredith slid from the counter and moved towards him. "Nothing has changed." She pushed up on her tip toes and kissed him again.

His eyes sparkled. "Is it possible for it to be as good as I remember?" he chuckled.

"Why don't we see."

When the conference ended, Meredith began considering moving away from Seattle, after all it wasn't that she had very many friends there. She had Lexie, but it seemed the Lexie and Mark were growing more serious, so it was possible that Lexie would be moving to NEw York. There was Dr. Bailey, but as much as MEredith appreciated her, they weren't close friends. Dr. Webber had tried to take over as a father figure in her life, but it would always bother Meredith that he had been partially the cause for her unhappy childhood. As months passed with frequent trips between Washington and Seattle, Derek asked her to move in. And Meredith took the chance and found an opening in Washington that would advance her career and be closer to Derek. It seemed like it had all worked out after all. For the first time in her life, she felt like all of the puzzle pieces were finally fitting together. She thought for a moment saying that she was blessed, but she refused to feed fate, because fate would stab her in the back in a heartbeat. But this twist of fate was enough, and Meredith was happy to arrive with all of her bags and boxes and move into Derek's house. No more flying back and forth between the coasts. She was home to stay.

****************How trying to save his marriage saved Derek Shepherd's life************


	12. Trampled by a Herd of Interns

**Thank you for the reviews. Last chapter was hard to stop because it did feel like something more than just an alternative way to save Derek. I might eventually come back to it and pull it into its own story. I hope whoever is reading this enjoys it, but honestly it is so enjoyable to me to find as many ways possible to save Derek's life. The show just isn't the same without him. **

Meredith was walking across the bridge, ready to dial Derek's phone when a herd of interns came rushing at her, jostling her so that she lost her grip on her phone before she was able to hit send. By the time the mass of them had passed her, she finally was able to grab her phone, thankful that the screen had not shattered. She didn't have time to have it fixed. The phone rang for a moment before Derek's voice picked up on the other end, "Mere?"

"Derek?" she voice was slightly panicked, but already just hearing his low timbre sent soothing waves through her. "Derek, where have you been? Washington called and said that you didn't make your flight."

He paused before answering. "There was an accident..."

Meredith's panic again rose at the thought of an accident. It couldn't be too bad, after all he was talking to her. He was alive. But she looked up and realized the irony that she was standing on this bridge of all places, that only foot away from her was where he had almost died at the hand of Mr. Clarke. "Are you all right?" she choked out. Terror washing her complexion white.

"I'm fine. I'm out on this road that I was trying to use as a short cut to the airport because there was a accident on the interstate. There is hardly any traffic at all, other than the red logging truck that just passed me. But some dumb kid was driving like an idiot, and he caused a pretty major accident. I'm glad I was here. I ended up saving several people, stabilizing them enough for the ride to the hospital. There isn't a scratch on me or even on my car."

"Oh, Derek." MEredith felt her legs giving out on her as she slid to the floor her breath raspy. "I was so scared. I had this bad feeling, a feeling so strong I almost didn't come in to work today, like the one I had during my intern year. And then I was worried that you had been shot or been in a plane crash... Derek there was a plane crash. Oh no, my pagers is going off. I've got to go."

"Mere, I'll call Washington and head back to Grey Sloan. If there was a crash, I'm sure you can use another pair of hands. And are you sure you're ok? You don't sound ok. You sound like your about to hyperventilate." He listened to her rapid breathing. "I'll be there as soon as I can. Just breathe, you've got this. I'll be right there."

Meredith rose on shaky legs and rushed down to the pit to help however she could. She had just stabilized a patient and was ready to head up to the OR when she felt arms envelope her. She immediately turned, still clothed in a trauma gown, and sought solace in her husband's embrace. "Derek, I don't want to lose you."

"110, remember?" He grinned, kissing her forehead. "I've got fly out in a couple of days to resign, but I think we should go as a family. I don't want to spend any more time away from you or the kids. And" he whispered discreetly, "I'd like to work more on adding to our family."

"When you called, I was on the bridge to your old office. When you told me that you'd almost been in an accident, I was a few feet from where you lay dying in a pool of blood. Sometimes I hate it here. Sometimes I wish that I just gone with you to Washington. We would have been closer to your family. I guess as a positive I found out I have another sister. But I just can't shake these images of you dying in front of me, of having to take you off of life support, of having to let you go. I know I said I could live without you, but what if I'm wrong? What if I had lost you today? What if I had to raise our children without you keeping them from being all dark and twisty? I don't want to ever live without you. I started the day chirping like Lexie or Izzie would have about how Blessed I am and then I'm basically having a panic attack because I think I could have lost you today. I don't want to have to tell Zola or Bailey that daddy is never coming home."

Derek silenced her frantic rambling with a kiss. "I'm fine. and I could be totally wrong, but with as emotional as you are today, I have to wonder if we already succeeded in making a new addition" he chuckled, his hand softly caressing the tender area between her shoulder blades. "Let's head up the the OR. I'm sure that we're both needed."

Meredith nodded at him and then pulled away from his arms and grabbed his hand heading for the elevator bank."Even if we haven't succeeded, we've got lots of time to keep trying."

********How Meredith nearly getting trampled by a herd of interns saved Derek Shepherd's life******************


	13. Not Diminished

**This one takes place at the beginning of season 11. IT gives another scenario where Derek can be saved without twisting a moment too much. It does change things drastically. I do include a lot of transcript from the end of season 10 and the first episode of season 11.**

Derek: I took the job!

Meredith:And you were supposed to be stepping back. You said, "take this year and make it count."

Derek: "And I'll make sure you can do it."

Meredith: And you lied!

Derek:Sorry. I lied. It's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

Meredith:So, you got your thing, and I gave up that piece. And I found a way to make it work with my job, my kids, and my research with less help from you, and I did it.

Derek: You're not a victim. I'm killing myself just as much as you are.

Meredith: And then you wanted...

Derek: I'm flying back...

Meredith: More pieces and more pieces.

Derek: And forth across the country... Twice a week...

Meredith: And now this is just too much.

Derek: So I can spend time with my kids...

Meredith: You can't just drag us away...

Derek: And be a good father.

Meredith: So I can come live in your shadow.

Derek: "Shadow"? You have a job. You're gonna be working at James Madison.

Meredith: Right, that's how my father got his first job here. They wanted my mom, so she had to call the university and pull some strings and find something for Thatcher to do. It's called a trailing spouse.

Derek: This is not like that.

Meredith: This is exactly that. And it's not what I signed up for.

Derek: You know what? You're-you're being selfish.

Meredith: Well, I have to be, Derek, because you believe that your career is more important than mine.

Derek: At this moment in time, it is!

Meredith: No, not at this moment... always. You will always be that hot-shot surgeon, and I will always be that young intern who fell in love with you.

Derek: If that's how you see yourself, that's your problem. I can't do anything about that.

Meredith: That is not how I see myself.

Derek: That is the issue here. [breathing heavily] D.C... You can do your surgeries, you can do your research, you can do the portal veins. There is nothing you can do here that you can't do there.

Meredith: But I don't want to! [sighs] We're not just talking about my job, Derek. We're talking about my life. I grew up here. I made my family here. I helped to rebuild the hospital here that has my sister's name on it, my mother's name, my name. I live here. My life is here. I don't want to leave.

Things were always quick to ignite between Meredith and Derek. Bothhad tempers, although Derek's was decidedly worse.

Derek: Hi.

Meredith: What are you doing here?

Derek: I just got off the phone with the white house. I resigned from the brain mapping initiative.

Meredith:What?

Derek: I'm not moving to D.C.

Meredith: Why would you do that?

Derek: Well, I don't want to live anywhere else when my kids are growing up here. I don't want to be apart from them, or you. No job is worth that to me. I want to be with you and the kids here.

Meredith: No.

Derek: What?

Meredith: This is not what we discussed. I mean, you should call them back and tell them you were kidding. I did not ask you to do this. I never wanted you...

Derek: I know you didn't. I chose. I chose you and the kids.

-end transcript-

Meredith looked up at him. "No. I'm not letting you give this up. I've had time to think about it. Before Christina left she gave me some words of wisdom. She told me that I am "a gifted surgeon with an extraordinary mind." She told me to never "let what [you] wants eclipse what [I] need." She acknowledged that you're "very dreamy. But [you're not the sun. I am."

I"m trying to do what is best for our family." Derek protested.

Meredith shook her head, "I know. But you know what, maybe this time it is me being selfish. We shouldn't sell the house here. I don't want to stay in D.C. forever, but Christina is wrong. I am a talented and skilled surgeon, but moving to D.C. for this does not diminish my skills. It doesn't make me shine less brightly. And you know, aside from Alex, there is no one left from my intern class at Grey-Sloan. Maybe I was just letting fear hold me back. Maybe I'm afraid that I'm not good enough, but I am." Meredith turned towards her husband. He was smiling down at her. His eyes sparkling.

"You are so much more than a trailing spouse. Any hospital would be lucky to have you. They're excited for you to come." He grabbed her hand and squeezed. "Are you sure, though? You are the kids are more important than anything else. I want you to be happy."

"The more I think about it, the more I think that a fresh start might be good. Out there they won't see me as the intern, and I won't be haunted by all of the horrible things have happened at Grey-Sloan, Seattle-Grace Mercy Death. I won't have to operate in an O.R. where I almost died because of a bomb, or where I had to give instructions to an intern to try and save my life before I passed out after giving birth to Bailey, or I won't have to be reminded daily of you nearly bleeding out on the bridge to your office or the O.R where I lost our baby or the one where I was willing to give up my life to save you and I thought I watched you die in. I won't be haunted daily by Denny and George and Lexie and Mark and my mom and Susan and all of the others that have died." Meredith paused for a moment to look into his eyes, staring across the bar table at him. She took a deep breath, "Maybe I need to get away from here more than I realized."

"Meredith, I don't want you to feel cornered. I approached this the wrong way. I think we both need time to really think about everything." He rubbed her hand. "But this time, we will make the decision together. It is your life, too."

"Let's go home and talk about it." Meredith squeezed his hand and rose. "Come on."

"Don't you need to tell Alex where you are going." Derek reminded.

"I think he's hiding in the bathroom. You should tell him. He's already annoyed at me. I interrupted his sleep this morning and kicked Jo out of bed."

"I guess I can relate to Jo more than I can Alex on that one." Derek chuckled. "I'll be right back."

"I'm sure he will be relieved to not have to deal with me all of the time." Meredith grinned, feeling like a weight had been lifted. "I can be a lot to handle."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

******How Meredith realized that moving to D.C. Didn't diminish the brightness of her career and saved the life of Dr. Derek Shepherd.**************


	14. Slamming on the Gas 2

Derek waved at the tow truck as it pulled with the last vehicle from the wreck. He walked over to his car and slid in the drivers seat. He was ready to head back home, or rather to Grey Sloan to see Meredith and the kids. He put the car into drive and pulled on to the road. The phone began reaching and he realized that he hadn't even thought to look for it after the wreck happened. He stopped, leaning over to search for the phone. It took just a moment to find the device, but once the phone was in his hand, he looked up and saw a semi bearing down on him. Derek slammed on the gas, aware that the farther back the impact was, the more likely he was to survive, and he wanted to survive. He had his entire life ahead of him.

His life flashed before him. His childhood on the east coast, surrounded by so any sisters that he felt he would never escape from the sea of Barbies and dress up clothes and eventually makeup, high heels and hair spray. He thought of college and medical school, of meeting Addison. And then he thought of meeting Meredith when his life started over, of the feeling of her in his arms as the scent of lavender swirled around him, of the feeling that he could breathe again for the first time in years, of meeting Zola and knowing he was meant to be her father, of holding Bailey, unsure if Meredith was going to make it. He thought of his mother, his sisters, and then he thought of Mark, all of the stupid things he had done in a lifetime as his friend. And he remembered those terrible moments in the woods which had led to some of the worst nightmares of his life.

And in an instant, it was over. He had given himself a few feet at most, but it was enough that the impact was on the back half of his car, which sent the front half pivoting to slam into the side of the truck. The sound was deafening as tires squealed and metal crunched and the airbags deployed nearly encasing him. There was a rain of glass as it shattered into pebbled pieces, showering him. His body thrown forward and sideways within the restraints. The crunching of metal surrounded him, and for a moment he wondered if he would be forever trapped in this moment. But finally, the motion stopped. The sounds stopped and there was silence except for the hissing of his destroyed car. He opened his eyes and began to survey the world around him and assess his physical condition. He was covered in small cuts, and the entire left side of his body throbbed. He reached down and unbuckled himself, transferring the phone to his left hand which had limited strength. Then he dialed 9-1-1.

As he waited for the line to pick up, he began making a list of his injuries. He was pretty sure his left arm was broken. It wasn't a compound fracture. That was good news. His left leg similarly had been on the side of impact, and if it wasn't broken, then it likely was deeply bruised. There was pain radiating up that extremity. But that was not life threatening. His head and his abdomen were where the most crucial injuries could be. Thankfully, his car was quipped with several airbags that had lessened the damage and protected him from the worst of the broken glass. He mentally began trying to assess his neurological function as one hand was pretty useless at this point and his right hand was holding the phone. He hadn't hit his head, at least that he could recall. Since the majority of the impact was on the side, he hadn't hit the steering wheel, which could have avoided the majority of damages.

"9-1-1, what is your emergency?" the operator chirped at him.

"There's been an accident," he began listing as specifically the location as he could. "There was an accident in the same spot an hour ago. The ambulance just left."

"I'll dispatch an ambulance right away. Please stay on the line, sir."

"Fine." he tried to work himself out of his seat, but there was searing pain all over on his left side. He gritted his teeth. And he pulled himself over the console into the passenger seat. The pain was white hot, searing as he moved his damaged left side. He nearly blacked out from the pain. He must have groaned because the operator responded with a concerned "Are you all right, sir?"

"It's fine. I'm trying to get out of the car, and I'm sure that my left arm and left leg were broken in the crash." He reached for the door handle and tried to open the door, but it wouldn't budge. "Dammnit." He groaned through clenched teeth. "The passenger door is stuck. I hope that they have the jaws of life." As he struggled with the door, he finally became aware of the truck driver who had climbed from his vehicle. The man came and began trying to pull the door open to free Derek.

"Sir." the operator spoke. "Should you be moving around. You could have injuries that you aren't aware of."

"I realize that. I'm a f***ing neurosurgeon. I'm fully aware of the possibilites. But this is the second accident in this exact spot today, and I don't want to a sitting duck for the next dumba** that decides to hotrod down this road." He paused. "I'm sorry. That was rude. But I would rather not take my chances."

"It's fine sir. The ambulance should be there soon."

The truck driver returned with a hammer, and Derek covered himself as well as he could as the man swung and shattered the passenger window. There would be more cuts, but Derek was beyond caring. He was again showered with glass, and then the other driver was reaching in to help pull him out of the car. Part of Derek wanted to curse the man, after all, he should have been paying more attention, he should have braked, but in all reality Derek knew that non of this would be an issue if he hadn't been such a dumba** and stopped his car in the middle of the road to find his cell phone, which he could have answered on the bluetooth, or pulled back of the road to find it, or if he had found his phone and tried to make some calls while he waited on the wrecker. All of his injuries were due to his own stupidity.

Soon Derek was free from the car amidst a string of expletives that his mother would have washed his mouth out for. With assistance, Derek made his way to the side of the road to wait for the telling wails of the sirens after pulling his medical bag from his trunk which had popped open in the collision. His leg could bear his weight, so a break was unlikely. He listed the positives. No one was dead. He hadn't hit his head. His chest and abdomen didn't seem injured. He didn't think his injured leg was broken. This could have been so much worse.

"Are you injured?" he asked the truck driver.

"No. I'm fine. But you look pretty banged up."

"Yeah, I'm not feeling so great." He lifted his shirt so that he could check his abdomen for bruising. Just because he couldn't feel it, didn't mean that there was no damage. Adrenaline can mask the extent of many injuries. Unfortunately there was some bruising on his left side that could mean most likely a damaged spleen. But considering the current state of his car, even this injury seemed less severe than it could have been.

"That's a nasty bruise," the other man offered. Then aver the sound of the other man came the faint wailing of the approaching ambulance.

"Thank God!" Derek breathed.

And within minutes the ambulance and other rescue vehicles arrived on site. They quickly assessed Derek and loaded him up on the back board. The other driver was loaded on a second rig to also be checked out. He road in silence, the pain rising as the adrenaline faded. The quiet murmurings of the EMTs was almost soothing in the familiarity.

They quickly arrived at the emergency room, but as soon as the doors opened, Derek began protesting. He was not met with familiar faces, instead they had taken him to some other hospital in the middle of nowhere. "Take me to Grey-Sloan." he demanded.

"Sir, you're injured." one of the EMTs protested.

"Yes, and I work at Grey-Sloan. My wife is at Grey-Sloan, and it is the ranking trauma center in the area. My injuries are not so severe that I should be dumped off at..." he trailed off with no name of the hospital where he currently was.

"Dillard Medical Center," the other EMT supplied.

"Dillard Medical Center, when I could be at one of the top trauma centers in the nation."

Finally they agreed, and the doors closed and the ambulance headed across Seattle to Grey-Sloan.

Derek fumbled with his phone while strapped to the backboard, though the EMTs were protesting. "I need to call the President and I need to call my wife."

His call to the President's office came first, and was brief. Then he dialed Meredith, who did not answer. So he called again, knowing that she was more likely to take it seriously if the phone rang a second time, even if she was in surgery.

"Dr. Grey's phone" answered a voice he did not recognize.

"It's her husband. Put it on speaker for her." he waited a beat until he could hear the faint sounds of the OR in the background, and then his wife's concerned voice. "Derek?"

"I've been in an accident. I'm in an ambulance on the way to Grey-Sloan. I'm pretty sure my arm is broken, and my spleen probably isn't in the best shape."

"Derek," she stuttered out. "How far out are you?"

"I don't know." He glanced at the EMTs. "I'll have you paged when I get there."

"I'll be waiting." Meredith promised. As soon as the conversation ended, Meredith quickly finished what she was doing and asked for a resident to close for her. She rushed out to the scrub room, and quickly scrubbed out before rushing down stairs to wait for Derek's arrival.

The rig was pulling in just as Meredith burst through the doors. Several interns were waiting for the next case and Meredith pushed past them, opening the doors of the ambulance herself. She almost cried in relief when she was finally able to look into his pale blue eyes. The interns all rushed forward and began moving him into the hospital. "I guess I don't need to page you, since you're already here." He offered with a smile. Meredith grabbed his right hand, and rushed with him into the pit.

As they moved Derek into the trauma room, Meredith was startled to find someone pulling here away. She started to struggle, but Alex's rough voice quickly stopped her. "Mer, he's ok. You're only going to get in the way."

"Mer," Derek's voice broke through the sounds of the pit. "I love you. Go check on Bailey and Zola. And call my mom. She needs to know. And you should probaly check if Amelia is in surgery, and if she's not, then she will want to see me."

Derek's voice galvanized her. She needed something to focus on. "Are you sure? You're hurt..."

"And there is no way that Hunt, or Bailey, or Webber are going to let you near the OR if they have to take out my spleen. And that is the only thing surgically wrong with me. But that means I will need an overnight bag, because I'm pretty sure mine is in the Cayenne and I'm not going to be getting it back any time soon." Alex released Meredith, and she crept slowly back to the bed, a sheen of tears filming her eyes. "I'm going to be ok. I'm sure to be safe, they should do a CT and an X-ray, but it's going to be ok."

Meredith leaned down and kissed him softly. Once the kiss had ended, he reached up with a hand that was tethered by lines and Ivs and brushed a tear from her face. "110, remember?"

She chuckled and nodded. "110. Got it. Just be ok. OK?" She clutched at his hand. "I love you, Derek Shepherd."

She stepped outside the Trauma room and pulled out her phone and dialed her mother-in-law's number."Carolyn? Derek has been in an accident. I think he's going to be ok, but he asked me to call you." she paused, waiting for the response from the other end of the line. "That's fine. I'll meet you at the airport as soon as you know when you're going to be here. I've got to find Amelia. But I know that Derek will be happy to know that you're on your way."

She took the elevator up to the OR wing, where she had no problem running into Amelia who was at the nurses station. "Hey." Meredith breathed.

"Hey, Mer. What's up?" Amelia tossed back.

"There was an accident while Derek was on his way to the airport. He's in the trauma room down stairs. He wanted me to come and find you." She offered. "He told me to go check on the kids, but I just don't want to be away from him."

"Come on." Amelia replied and grabbed her hand, pulling back to the elevator she had just exited. "The kids are fine. Some one would page you if they weren't."

By the time they reached the pit, Derek was already gone. "He's in the lodox right now." one of the nurses reassured them, which led to Meredith and Amelia following Derek's path. It made sense with all of the potential injuries to do the full body scan instead of two separate scans. They watched as the 13 seconds elapsed and all of Derek's injuries were clearly visible on the the screen. There was a hairline fracture in his ulna, and his spleen was heavily damaged. The rest of the injuries seemed to be soft tissue damage and a bone bruise on his hip.

While Meredith and Amelia waited, Bailey appeared. "I know that two of my doctors aren't just standing here, waiting around, twiddling their thumbs. Get to work." She dictated.

Amelia bristled at Bailey, but Meredith had long grown familiar with taking directions from Miranda Bailey. "It's Derek."

Bailey paused and turned back to Meredith. "What's Derek?"

"In the lodox." She motioned towards her husband. "There was a bad accident on the way to the airport."

Meredith had calmed down, while Amelia had only grown more agitated.

"The damn fool," Bailey muttered. "What's he doing getting into a car accident? I came down here for a consult for some idiot that pulled out in front of a logging truck and was t-boned." Here eyes grew wide. "You're telling me that this idiot stopped his car in the middle of the road and basically got run over by a semi and all that is wrong with him is a broken arm and a bad spleen?"

Amelia glanced at Meredith. "He did what?"

"I didn't know that it was because he pulled out in front of a semi." Meredith excused.

"I didn't pull out in front of a semi. That implies that I knew it was there. I pulled out on to the road after saving four people's lives and my phone started ringing and I reached for it, and when I looked up there was a logging truck, not a semi baring down on me, and I slammed on the gas as hard as I could." Derek offered sheepishly after being removed from the scanner and placed back on the gurney.

"You idiot." Amelia jibbed. "You have a porsche. Are you going to tell me that you don't have blue tooth? Because I know you do. This all could have been avoided."

"Yes, I realize that I was an idiot." Derek snipped back at her. "So sorry to inconvenience you when I'm the one who is going to have an organ removed because of my stupidity."

Meredith moved to his side and smiled at him. "For a brain surgeon, you really can be pretty brainless." She leaned down and kissed him gently. "But I'm pretty happy with all things considered that you aren't hurt more than you are."

He pulled her hand up to his lips. "You know how they say that you're life flashes before your eyes. It really did. But all I could think was that I wanted more time with you. There will never be enough time."

"OK, enough of this. Dr. Grey. Dr. Shepherd. I'm taking him up to the OR. So I get the two of you out of my hair." Bailey smiled despite the stern words.

"Fine." Meredith agreed. "But after this surgery, we are going to talk about your idiocy." She gave a pointed glance at her husband.

"I will never be that stupid again." He promised. "And Meredith, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm putting you through this."

There was a looked that passed between them, acknowledging for a moment the time after the shooting when Derek's driving had Meredith stressed beyond reason that she would lose him in a car accident. And now that fear had come very close to becoming a reality. She offered him a tremulous smile. They would deal with her fears again later. She had always been so strong for him and everyone else, and after this, he wanted her to be able to know that he would be there for her.

Hours later, Derek slowly came to consciousness, awareness drifting back like the gentle waves of the pond by their home. He had had moments of lucidity in the recovery room, and he remembered counting back in the OR as Miranda Bailey stood over him. He realized that someone was clutching his hand. He looked over to his right, and his wife was sitting there her head bent over, asleep, but holding onto him like a lifeline. He moved his thumb over hers in slow circles, and she slowly stirred. Her head suddenly jerked up, "Oh, Derek. You're awake!" She cried.

"I'm awake," he offered with a rasp in his voice from the intubation during the surgery.

"The surgery went smoothly. And Callie looked at your arm, but its a clean break. Everything else will just get better in time." She said in a rush. "Your mom should be here a few hours. Amelia is going to pick her up, and she isn't thrilled. Maggie took Bailey and Zola home."

"Meredith," he breathed. "I'm going to be all right. I'm clearly an idiot, but I'm still mostly in one piece." Meredith began crying, her shoulders shaking with the emotion. "Mer, come here." he pleaded.

"I can't. I'll hurt you." She replied.

"As long as you're here on my right side, It will be fine. I've been wanting to hold you for hours." He tugged on her hand. "Please come here. I need you."

And finally she compiled, and crawled into the bed beside him. They both drew comfort from the presence of the other.

***** How slamming on the gas saved Derek Shepherd's Life *********

_I feel like this is the second chapter that doesn't feel like a one shot, but feels like the beginning of another story. We will see. And anyone that wants to use one of the other chapters as a jumping off point, just message me and acknowledge this story in your first chapter. Hope that you enjoyed this installment of Tell Me How to Save a Life._


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